Friday, 29 July 2016

My second RT session

Hey everyone, I thought I would just have to write a post about my second RT session that i've had this week with Mistress Courtney.  I had been looking forward to it so much, and as the day grew closer I got the same nervous excitement I had last time.

As I knocked on the door the nerves peaked, but as the door opened and I saw Mistresses eyes and smile they just disappeared, we had a little chat and I was taken into the dungeon.  I was undressed and Mistress seemed to like the panties i'd been instructed to wear, I was then sat to have full makeup applied, having little things explained, and one very obvious gulp on my part when Mistress said she might make me arrive in makeup sometime, I was then put in a blue floaty dress and a wig before being shown to a mirror.  I looked so different to normal and felt so so girly and had some pics taken. I was then cuffed to a bar suspended from the ceiling. Mistress was so happy with the makeover job she asked another Mistress to have a look, I got so shy then.

Over the session I was teased, tickled, spanked, paddled, scratched, put in bondage, wrote on in lipstick, laughed at until I was squirming.  I had the feeling I just wanted to do whatever Mistress Courtney wanted, i'm not going to share all of the details, and i'm not going to post the pics Mistress took of my tiny thing, well because no-one would want to see that, even with the clamp attached.  But have to say how much I enjoyed it, we had a drink and a chat after which I really enjoyed, there were ideas mentioned that mad me tremble, but i've dreamt of them since which is a bit crazy.  Mistress Courtneys website is and I can't thank her enough.

I feel really lucky that i've had these experiences, and really hope to have more, its hard to explain, but it feels like i'm actually being me, i've been pretty much on a high since the session, and have a task to work on, and a rule I have to follow.

I know the next few days will involve a lot of makeup for my task, I just hope I can get it ok, I feel like i'm under pressure now *blushes* I may try something with this No7 set (with a guest appearance of a barryM lipstick)

It'll be maybe that or the liquid eyeshadow from MaxFactor thats at the bottom here, It goes so well with this lipstick

Anyway thats me for this post, i'm off to practice, feel free to chat to me on Twitter i'd love to hear peoples thoughts, and have a lovely weekend

Cinnamon xxx

Monday, 25 July 2016

An apology, an update and a helluva excited sissy!

Hey everyone,

  First thing i'd like to do is apologise that I haven't really blogged for the last month, theres been a couple things in real life that had to be done.  Hectic would be describing the last month mildly.

 Of course there has still been plenty of time for my mind to keep imagining ever more realistic and humiliating fantasies and situations, and they've been driving the ache wild.  Also what is now pretty much ritual listening to the MeanGirls audios and watching the Humiliation Playlist has driven my mind further than I thought possible.  And now its been so long since I was last allowed a cumsie I feel pretty much turned on all the time.

I've found that the longer i'm denied the more i'm struggling as I practice my makeup, my concentration just slips at the slightest touch of a brush and I end up getting all wrong.  But anyways time for the update.  Something happened at the weekend that I could never have imagined happening,  some of you may remember a couple months ago, I blogged that i'd confessed to one of my best friends about some of this "secret" side of me.  About dressing, about feeling submissive, but keeping some of the humiliation side of it quiet.  Well she invited me to hers for the night and said to sleepover, I had no idea what to expect, and was a bit nervous but had no reason to be, (there must be a reason real best friends stay friends for life)  We had a couple glasses of wine and a chat, and as the night rolled on the topics kind of altered, there was nothing sexual about it at all, but she lightheartedly teased out some more secrets, for instance she now knows that I dont decide when I have an orgasm, and how my mind feels about that a little bit about the ache that denial brings.  We talked about makeup, clothes and allsorts, i'm still trying to get my head around some of the things about clothes and styles she mentioned.  Trying to find things online that would fit and maybe suit me.  Not lying the night went so fast and before we both went to bed we had what to me was an amazing cuddle, its been so long since anyone genuinely hugged me like that, I really really felt safe.

I was nervous waking up the next day, but needn't have been.  She was the same with me as she always was,  and before I left was saying we would have to have a day out shopping where she could help me.  I was blushing all the way home I tell you.

I drank plenty of coffee when I got home, both reliving the events of the night before, and also anticipating the next few days,  when I have my second RT session with Mistress Courtney, and the excitement is building to a fever pitch, I love the thought in my mind that I just dont know what will happen, I think it makes the anticipation greater,  I've already been given instruction on one thing I have to wear *blushes*  I feel very lucky to be allowed to go back, and i'm sure i'll be telling you all some of what happens afterwards.

I can remember the feeling after the first session and hope that its the same after this one, a feeling where you just float through the rest of the week.  Also hope I may get chance to speak to the MeanGirls soon too because their laugh wow, well that would just push this whole week to another level.  Anyways thats me for now, so thanks for reading and as always feel free to chat me on twitter

Cinnamon xx

Wednesday, 6 July 2016

Musings of a frustrated mind

Hi everyone, its been a while since i've wrote a post, so thought I would post an update.  It'll be a different style than usual as i've not had anything like a session or a call to write about.  Its been 3.5 weeks since I last called the MeanGirls and the ache I am feeling has now built up to a level I dont think i've experienced before, the last few days have had me all emotional, and trying anything I can to try and distract myself from the ache.

You know its so hard to explain,  from waking up in the morning to hitting the sack at night the ache is there.  Always a constant reminder, i've been avoiding listening to any of the MeanGirls audios I have, or even watching the humiliation playlist.   I get to the edge so quick and i'm petrified I will lose it.  Its not much at all that sets if off, almost like a permanent state of semi-arousal,  I genuinely think chastity would be easier, shame i'm too tiny to fit in the cage I won *blushes*

When my mind gets wandering my fantasies are seeming to get kinkier than ever, more humiliating and somehow more intense.  I just wish my work schedule was a bit different as I know realistically it will be the weekend before I even get a chance to call them, i'll certainly cross my fingers that I do.  I wish I could share some of the fantasies, and I know in the future I will, I just can't risk setting the arousal off again,

Trying to stay away from edging to try not make the ache worse I've been practicing with makeup a lot, and even trying to pick out my favourite lipstick.  I could actually wear a different one each day for over a month and not use the same one twice.  I've got it narrowed down to maybe 5/6 but cannot choose any further, what is a Sissy to do?  Especially when my fave cosmetics company keep emailing me about offers.!

One thing I do have to look forward to is my second Real Time session with Mistress Courtney.  I have a week off at the end of the month so will be going then.  It's very exciting as I really enjoyed last time, it felt like a weight off my mind as i'd been thinking about it for years and I have no idea what will be planned for me *gulp* I still remember this pic from the first session *blushes*

Sorry its only a short post and no real humiliation in it, just wanted to give everyone an update, i'm still genuinely surprised at the views this blog has, its in the 1000's now, and I wanted to thank anyone who does read it.  I never thought when the MeanGirls asked me to start one that I would have the feedback of people that i've had and the compliments, and in a way acceptance, so thank you all of you, you rock xx

Lastly would like to say that its very nearly a whole year since I first called the MeanGirls, I really can't believe the things i've done, and admitted to myself in this time, and I need to thank them too.  Hopefully i'll get to celebrate the anniversary in a special way

luv ya all, and feel free to chat with me on here or on twitter

 Cinnamon xx