Wednesday, 6 July 2016

Musings of a frustrated mind

Hi everyone, its been a while since i've wrote a post, so thought I would post an update.  It'll be a different style than usual as i've not had anything like a session or a call to write about.  Its been 3.5 weeks since I last called the MeanGirls and the ache I am feeling has now built up to a level I dont think i've experienced before, the last few days have had me all emotional, and trying anything I can to try and distract myself from the ache.

You know its so hard to explain,  from waking up in the morning to hitting the sack at night the ache is there.  Always a constant reminder, i've been avoiding listening to any of the MeanGirls audios I have, or even watching the humiliation playlist.   I get to the edge so quick and i'm petrified I will lose it.  Its not much at all that sets if off, almost like a permanent state of semi-arousal,  I genuinely think chastity would be easier, shame i'm too tiny to fit in the cage I won *blushes*

When my mind gets wandering my fantasies are seeming to get kinkier than ever, more humiliating and somehow more intense.  I just wish my work schedule was a bit different as I know realistically it will be the weekend before I even get a chance to call them, i'll certainly cross my fingers that I do.  I wish I could share some of the fantasies, and I know in the future I will, I just can't risk setting the arousal off again,

Trying to stay away from edging to try not make the ache worse I've been practicing with makeup a lot, and even trying to pick out my favourite lipstick.  I could actually wear a different one each day for over a month and not use the same one twice.  I've got it narrowed down to maybe 5/6 but cannot choose any further, what is a Sissy to do?  Especially when my fave cosmetics company keep emailing me about offers.!

One thing I do have to look forward to is my second Real Time session with Mistress Courtney.  I have a week off at the end of the month so will be going then.  It's very exciting as I really enjoyed last time, it felt like a weight off my mind as i'd been thinking about it for years and I have no idea what will be planned for me *gulp* I still remember this pic from the first session *blushes*

Sorry its only a short post and no real humiliation in it, just wanted to give everyone an update, i'm still genuinely surprised at the views this blog has, its in the 1000's now, and I wanted to thank anyone who does read it.  I never thought when the MeanGirls asked me to start one that I would have the feedback of people that i've had and the compliments, and in a way acceptance, so thank you all of you, you rock xx

Lastly would like to say that its very nearly a whole year since I first called the MeanGirls, I really can't believe the things i've done, and admitted to myself in this time, and I need to thank them too.  Hopefully i'll get to celebrate the anniversary in a special way

luv ya all, and feel free to chat with me on here or on twitter

 Cinnamon xx

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