An explanation, an update and an awesome time with Mistress

Hi everyone, firstly I guess an apology is in order, its been an absolute age since I last posted a blog on here.  Theres been a lot going on in my vanilla life careerwise, and combined with not really having much time for kinky fun over xmas and not having any trips out etc this blog kind of took a back seat.  I mean theres been plenty of cinnamon time at home, but no-one wants to read a blog of how I tease myself and get off do they?  Lol

I did have one memorable day shopping with my friend again, this time with the sole purpose of finding things for me.  It was a great morning and hopefully soon it will happen again, (after a payday) and maybe at a slightly larger shopping place than the town we were in. It is definitely easier shopping being with someone, I keep thanking my friend, but I dont think she realises how much she's helped me!



Of course a lot of my blogs in the last couple of years have been about my adventures with  Mistress Courtney and this weekend just past finally after a couple of months I got to see and catch up with Mistress in another wonderful session, getting some time off has been tricky with the career change, but managed to get the date set.  If i'm being honest I was looking forward to it from the moment I received the email saying it was all booked.  Then the day before I got a msg saying I should wear makeup to the dungeon, the more makeup the better the rewards, and the less makeup the worse the punishment.  That pretty much put my head in cinnamon mode right then and spent the evening before panicking about the drive.  I did have a couple of things to do in the morning and found myself with a rushed window to try and make my makeup look good.  I also had to make sure I was in girly lingerie and stockings too.  But luckily I just had enough time and set off on the paranoid journey to the dungeon. Armed with the Christmas gift I still had for Mistress I got out of my local town, but I'm certain someone spotted me in all the makeup, I caught them pointing out of a car at mine, and just wanted the traffic lights to change.  But I arrived without any further sightings and got myself parked up before awaiting that magical text.  I headed in as instructed and as that door opened any nerves I had disappeared.  I was greeted warmly by Mistress who looked as amazing as ever, and as a plus point she liked the gift I had taken.  After a little chat, I was shown into the larger dungeon room, saying a quick hello to Mistress Luci and Princess Lucina as I walked through.  I was allowed to use the bathroom quickly as Mistress got us some water, and then well the fun really started.....

Mistress with me strapped down at her mercy

I never go into much detail about what actually happens in the dungeon, and sorry I'm not really going to start now, but I will say the session was full of me being tormented, scratched restrained spanked, sat on, teased tickled, and for my first time with Mistress Courtney, caned, yes caned, as in swishy sticks of stingingness I've been afraid of for so long.  I can remember holding my breath after Mistress explained about them, unable to move strapped down on the bench, and then somehow, I think it was the tickling prior to the first stroke I giggled, this didn't go un-noticed, but although Mistress said she was a bit rougher on me than normal, and I dont really class myself as liking pain despite the stinging I felt quite exhilarated. After being on the bench, then led over Mistresses knee I was strapped down on my back, I literally couldnt have moved if there was all the chocolate in the world next to me.  I lost track of time then as I was taken somehow into that floaty special place, where all I can hear is Mistresses voice yet I hardly can tell what is being said.  Those nails scratching felt so sharp, (i'm still finding scratches all over which is awesome) but when they tickled I squirmed.  I know I was sat on at one point, which was another new experience for me in a session, and when the time came, well something happened I certainly wasn't expecting, and I dont think Mistress was either.  I blame the doxy!!

The beautiful Mistress Courtney

I was released from the restraints and left to just relax a moment, before being allowed to clean up and get dressed.  After that we had a chat which was awesome to catch up, but also get some possible future ideas, I liked Mistresses smile when I said that with the new job I could pretty much always get some time to help her if needed, and I know I wont leave it as long till I see Mistress again, i'd go every week if I could!!!


I drove home with a huge smile on my face, and spent the next day and a half re-imagining everything.  Thankfully even despite a monday morning commute with a frozen car i've avoided the dreaded drop so far.  I guess it may have taken just over a month but my first kinky experience of the year was worth the wait.

I'm going to leave this here for now, hope you enjoy, and also hope it wont be as long before my next blog post.  As always feel free to chat to me on twitter

Stay kinky, cinnamon xxx

A day of helping film with Miss Courtney

Hi everyone, I thought I would write a post about a really fun day I had last week.  Helping Mistress Courtney film some clips for her clips stores.  And on a chilly afternoon what better way to write a blog than a hot and milky coffee

If you've read my blogs before you will know that I have helped film a few times before with Mistress and had always enjoyed helping, so when I was asked again I jumped at the opportunity.  Mistress had booked a dungeon studio called The Facility, in Birmingham and the day before had confirmed the times etc with me.

I woke up early and made sure I had a proper breakfast for once and set off.  My mind wandering in my car, wondering what this place would be like, would I just be behind the camera? or as Mistress had said maybe there would be a little clip with me in,  I was glad i'd allowed extra time as the roads seemed to be feeling the effects of a certain Ophelia, the sky and sun a strange colour and the damn 50 mph limit on the M6 rolling into one huge jam.  But still I managed to get there about 5 minutes before we'd agreed and after driving up and down the road not seeing the studio thought I'd park up and wait for Mistress.  After a moment I saw Mistresses car coming down the road, and we waved at each other, as Mistress parked I walked over and said hi.  As none of us had been here before we had a giggle looking for the place, even walking into the wrong yard of some units at one point before finding the place and moving our cars to their car park.   Whilst we unloaded the car the first filming slaves arrived and we were all introduced.  It was very quiet at first as we were getting ready.  The room we were using was really well equipped and I set up the lighting for the area we were going to be using first as Mistress was throwing some ideas around and some of the formalities were done.  (paperwork, it gets everywhere)

Some images of the amazing Mistress Courtney

Pretty soon we were off with the clips.  As always I'm not going to go into too much detail about them, you'll have to check Mistresses store out.  I'm often transfixed while filming, trying to make sure I get the camera right while being in awe of Mistress, she has a certain aura of dominance and flows like an artist through a scene, I feel very lucky that i've had the chance to witness it, even though with some things I get cravings like I wish it was happening to me, in between scenes Mistress often tells me she could tell I liked the last one, which just sets me off blushing.

We filmed a good few clips, including a couple of role-play clips that had me trembling behind the camera, (thank god for tripods) and a couple that made me want to close my eyes, I couldnt of course.  Then there was a little swap around, as the first couple of slaves left and another arrived, We had a little break and then started again with the new slave, who also dresses, Sophie.  Mistress did her makeup, and I was a little envious watching, but still enjoyed it.  Before some clips involving cling film, foot worship, strap on play and a cute pink sissy dress.  It did get late very quick and we had to wrap the day up, I wasn't in any clips this time.  But Mistress mentioned booking another day after her holiday.  The Facility was a really good space to film in.  I think there were other ideas that we just didnt have time to get through


After packing up and saying my goodbyes I left for the thankfully quieter drive home feeling an ache all the way, picturing some of the things i'd seen, imagining being knelt before Mistress and smiling all the way home.  I couldn't really relax in my thoughts that evening though as I was home and instantly get ready for work the next day.  I knew later in the week as well I had another evening out as cinnamon at the Halloween Events Chambers party.  Thats being saved for another blog though, and for now I am going to wrap this one up.  Thanks for reading and feel free to chat to me on twitter


Cinnamon xxx

PS.  Feel free to check out Mistress Courtney's clip store here

Another wonderful session with Mistress Courtney

Hey everyone, I thought I would make a blog about my latest session with the amazing Mistress Courtney this week.  Having a couple of days booked off, I managed to book the session and had been building up excitement to it as I always do.  Yes sure I am lucky I can indulge in my thoughts and fantasies at home pretty much whenever I like but theres something about an actual session, that just magnifies all my thoughts.

I spent the day beforehand getting myself ready, and letting my mind wander before getting in my car and making that now familiar drive.  As always when I parked I sent a text to say I was there and felt my nervous excitement grow until the reply came through to come down.  I knocked at the door and was let in and greeted by Mistress, who looked as gorgeous as ever.  I was allowed to use the WC and then was shown into the dungeon.  I was told a couple of things, and then left to get myself stripped to my panties and my wig,  I'm never the most confident about my body, so felt quite exposed as I was sat there in only panties, but felt myself melt as Mistress opened the door and walked in with a dress.  There was so much satin and lace, as I was helped to put it on I just felt so submissive, and the sensations as it rubbed over my body gave me a goosebump or two.  Which Mistress duly noted.

An old photo of me and Mistress

I posed for a couple of pics, and had to do a twirl, and even briefly show Mistress Luci which definitely made me blush, then I was cuffed to the bar above my head, and given a punishment, with a strap followed by a spanking, paddling and I think a crop as well.  I felt something i've never felt before and could consciously feel myself try to stick my bottom out inbetween spanks,  despite the stinging I soon felt. When I was uncured I was given a sip of water, before being strapped to the gynae bench, unable to move with my arms and legs secured.  Then Mistress put a gag on me (I have a phobia about things in my mouth, but somehow wanted to at least try) Then a blindfold as well.  In that moment I felt a vulnerability i've never felt before.  I couldnt see, couldnt speak, couldnt move, (other than squirm) everything seemed magnified, from Mistress voice, to the touch of the various things she used to tease and torment me.  I could constantly feel my eyes trying to dart around behind the blindfold even though everything was dark for me.  Making little moaning sounds behind the gag as I was made to squirm.  I lost track of time, and just got in that special place.  Riding an edge for what seemed an age before being denied (well for now)  As the gag and blindold were removed  Mistress watched as I drifted back into normality and explained that I could text and ask permission later that night to make my panties sticky.  I was untied and left to get dressed again and Mistress made us a drink.

We sat and had a coffee and a chat and I always enjoy this.  A couple of ideas were discussed and I realised how easy Mistress can make me drift off as she pressed one of my triggers before I was let go to float my way home.  I've said it before, but following being in that place in my head no amount of traffic on the M60 can annoy you.  Then once I got home I made some food and changed into some of my naughtiest lingerie and teased myself before texting and asking Mistress for permission.  I beamed when the reply came back and after a little more teasing did what i'd been told hehe.

Maybe my outfit for saturday night

You know i'm already looking forward to my next kinky fun with Mistress.  But I also have another fun night at The Manchester Chambers planned for this weekend, and they are always such fun nights.  I just need to figure my outfit out now for it, i'm thinking of daring to try something a little sluttier than usual, but thats because of my naughty moods from the last week or so.  I also did debate trying to find a localish place to the chambers that may have done a makeover.  But that idea has gone for now, due to cost and well the time i'd need I guess.  Maybe another time!  If my really slutty idea doesn't work out then I may try this dress again





Anyways i'm gonna wrap this up and i'm sure you'll be seeing more on here soon.  Feel free to chat on twitter as always and have a great and kinky weekend!

Cinnamon xxx

A kinky and fun few days

Hey everyone,  I thought I would have to put together a blog post about the last week or so, its been lots of fun for me.  So I made myself a cappuccino as is always necessary and here goes!!

Firstly last week one afternoon I had the opportunity to meet Mistress Courtney, and spend some time with her.  I finally got to give Mistress the last part of her birthday present, and we had some fun.  I had to take a selection of some of my girly things and Mistress chose me an outfit to wear out of my case and did my makeup, which always feels sooooooooooooo.  I was restrained and paddled and spanked, which felt a little harder than the other times, before being tied down totally and I was subjected to a tickling,  scratching, tormenting experience, I was kind of blindfolded with a pair of my own panties, it really really enhanced the feelings, and its been giving me all kinds of flashbacks. I was totally lost in that moment, and can just remember that giggle, and my body jerking, squirming but being unable to really move.  Mistress also explained a little more about something she mentioned last time, that when I go to that special place, my eyes seem to change, I find this fascinating in fact i've tried to replicate it at home in front of a mirror, but not had any luck yet. I can't wait to have some more fun with Mistress.  There were a couple of things mentioned that sounded so exciting, just so very exciting.

The fishnets I wore for the night

Then after a couple of hellish shifts at work I found myself getting ready to attend another party at the Manchester Chambers  Anyone who's read my previous blogs will know i've been to a few events there now.  My plan for the evening after work was get home, eat and shower, then get as ready as I could while still having boy clothes over the top, and as is seemingly getting a familiar routine did the basics of my makeup while still at home.  I drove to the Chambers, wondering how this time would be, I had no nerves at all this time, just the usual paranoia as I drove through the traffic.  I parked up and headed inside and was greeted by Diva Karishma  Mistress Arabella and a few other people I have met before.  In no time I had nipped to the changing rooms and fully got changed, before heading down to the bar area, It was a very friendly night, as always and I felt relaxed, even when I was threatened with a caning, scarily I may have been a little excited at that point.  During the night it was great to chat with others, about all sorts of kink, plus some vanilla stuff too.  There was also a few demo's that had been arranged, these were fantastic, they involved a stapler and a very sharp bed of nails, that frightened the life out of me, but looked amazing, especially when the lady was led on the bed, and had a Mistress stand on top.  Following this there was a burlesque style strip from a smouldering secretary look down to not very much at all, and it culminated with a lot of red wax that the lady poured over herself.  In the dark light and to the music that was playing I got a distinct vampiric vibe that I really loved.

Another demo a little later was by Mistress Lola who had attached two milking units up to a Venus2000 machine, and a challenge was set for two slaves, the first to lose control of their cock would lose and therefore have to take a caning.  You wouldn't believe it but this ended as a dead heat so both of the slaves had to take a caning, the machine itself is something that looks nice, but you can easily see how you could get punished, imagine being attached to that with no mercy, yikes that would get sensitive quickly.  Anyways after a thoroughly enjoyable evening I had to revert to my boy clothes and get myself home.  The problem with my early starts are that I can never seem to make it to the end of the night!


Back at home on the sunday I just had to indulge in Sissy Sunday, and after the few days i'd had I teased myself to some trembling edges before finally ruining an orgasm that seemed to just ooze out for ages, i've finally found something more frustrating than my football team losing.  Anyways i'm going to wrap this up now as i've realised I now have a free weekend next week so need to make myself a plan for it.   So as always feel free to chat to me on twitter and hope you've enjoyed

Cinnamon xx

My latest session

Hey, firstly i'd like to apologise as its been an age since I have posted a blog on here.  I've kept starting and stopping on a few and just couldnt get one wrote that I like. But anyways I hope this one gets me back up to speed.

It had been a while since I had been to see Mistress Courtney at the dungeon, its been a busy couple of months, but having some time off from work I managed to get a session booked for earlier this week.  I'd been looking forward to it for ages, even before it was booked and for the few days before my mind was wandering into ever deeper fantasies.  It came to the morning of the session and as I sent a confirmation text my thoughts were tingling, once again I had no idea what Mistress had planned and found it exciting.

Me and Mistress Courtney 

Despite greater manchester traffics best attempts to slow me down I just about made it and parked up at pretty much the exact right time.  Sent a text and awaited the order,  I was actually thinking of the first time I did this, the nervous excitement I had, and once again felt those butterflies.  My phone beeped with a message from Mistress telling me to go to the door and I headed in.

I was shown in and said hello to Princess Lucina, before being led to the large dungeon room and had a little chat before the session started.  I was undressed by Mistress who really liked the animal print cami and panties I had on, so much that Mistress said she was just going to keep me in those rather than what she had planned and then I had the treat of Mistress doing my makeup.  Then  I was tied with my arms above my head while Mistress teased me, and spanked and went through a couple of crops, and a paddle, then I was told to get over Mistresses knee for a spanking, including one part where I was lucky to get spanked for every birthday Mistress has had.  Next I was strapped into a chair that scarily looks like it would be ideal for cbt, my legs strapped apart and my arms stretched out to the side of me, totally exposed, I can't say what exactly happened then, my head just drifted into that place, as I was teased, Mistress didnt need to shout, even whispering at points.  I was told that my eyes change or do something when Mistress takes me into that special place.  That made me tingle even more, I was being brought to edge after edge by the aid of a Doxy.  I was untied from the chair and then ordered to kneel before Mistress as the doxy was continued to be used, eventually to a lot of laughter I was trying to hump against it,  really feeling like I couldnt hold it any longer, and then it was pulled away, it took a moment for me to stop humping even though it was now only air, as Mistress told me I was to be all aching and aroused when I have my night out at the weekend.

I was then left to dress and had a chat and a coffee with Mistress, where I gave her her birthday presents and we chatted about a couple of things coming up that sound very exciting to me and I was given a couple of homework tasks and told no cumsies till sunday.  I left and drove home via a friends house who could tell that i'd been to see Mistress, according to a text later on I was glowing.  To be honest as always I seem to have been floating since.  

It may not be as long until I make another blog post as tomorrow night sees the second Bitches UnleaSHED event in Manchester.  I have my ticket and have a nervous excitement about it.  Last time I attended with Mistress, this time I will have the S on my head and have no idea what may happen.  I'm sure anyone who reads this blog may find out!!

Anyways I'm going to wrap this up, and as always feel free to chat, either here or on twitter

Cinnamon xx

Another amazing session

Hey everyone, its been a couple of weeks since I posted, few things on and to be honest been looking forward to something quite a bit.  I mentioned a couple of times that the first anniversary of my first session was coming up, and well earlier this week It happened, and what better way to spend it than having another session with the amazing Mistress Courtney

I've been looking back over the year building up to this, remembering the feelings I had at this time last year, the nerves, the excitement, with a little bit of fear as well I guess.  Whilst all the time getting some similar feelings, well the fear has gone now, I think that was just because it was my first time, and totally unknown.  There was definitely excitement and some nerves too, but i'll get to those in a little bit.  I actually found myself getting lost in thoughts for a good few nights before the day.  I even spent the last few days before keeping myself in virtual bubblewrap to make sure I didnt get any injuries or anything.

I'd been thinking a lot of my first session, exactly a year ago

The day before the session Mistress told me she would like me to be wearing underwear under my clothes, and some makeup when I arrived.  That was where those nerves came in, I know I drove to meet Mistress before Bitches UnleSHED wearing makeup, but that was at night, in the dark.  This was going to be broad daylight, well that night I tossed and turned in bed but eventually drifted off into a dream that ended up being very humiliating.  I woke up on the day and sent a confirmation message and was told to bring the dress I wore while filming a couple of weeks ago and then had a relaxing morning, getting everything ready, before having some lunch and then getting dressed,  I chose a baby pink babydoll, baby pink fishnets and some silky pink panties with a lace trim on underneath a shirt and jeans.  I had no idea what makeup to wear, so I started with foundation and a hint of blush, a little eyeshadow and liner and mascara, I had a little play with my eyebrows too.  Finally for the lips, I used a lip crayon that came out much brighter than I thought it was, but I didn't have time to change it.  Grabbing my bag I got to my car as quick as possible while keeping my head down, and was so conscious all the way to the dungeon, trying to keep my head as straight as possible, especially through the busy section of roadworks on the M60, I parked up and was shaking a little.  Trying not to be seen by any passers by, I received a text telling me to go in, I had to put on my dress, and a wig and eye mask Mistress had left out, and to wait.

 As I approached the door I had a flashback of the first time that door opened to me last year. I was tingling as I got myself how Mistress wanted and then put the mask on.  I really couldnt see, then heard a little giggle as Mistress came in, I felt those sharp fingernails lightly brush along my arm,  now as always i'm not going to go into all the details of the session but at one point I was shown a video of me being spanked by Mistress, while she re-enacted the clip at the same time, it was like an overload of senses, watching it while feeling it at the same time, I was then tied up, which gave Mistress something to pull me about on.  It gave me such a great feeling as I was totally trapped.  I was then spanked again over Mistresses knee and I found out after that i'd been introduced to a cane for the first time. I was then turned over and teased a lot more with a Doxy, Mistress was mentioning all kinds of idea's, my head was just in that place where everything just feels right, and the ideas were making me even more excited.  I was writhing as the teasing continued.

Panties made sticky for the journey home

  I was allowed after a while to "make my panties wet and sticky for the drive home" and with the help of the Doxy and Mistresses permission had one of the most intense orgasms i've ever had.  I was kind of spaced out then, and was told to just lie there a minute as Mistress went to get some water.


Mistress came back and we chatted as I sort of came back round, before leaving me to get dressed.  I had to keep the sticky panties on though and we had another chat about the session and some possible future plans again and I gave Mistress a little surprise gift i'd got her, I was delighted that she liked it, when I left the dungeon I was on a high, and once again just drifted through the rush hour traffic, I spent the evening still feeling like I was floating, reliving not just that session but bits from all the sessions and things over the last year.  Its taken me a couple of days to let everything sink through for me to write about it, i'm sure i'll still be having flashbacks for a long time.


I've been thinking of the last year or so as a whole lately, I know I feel more comfortable in myself, lived some dreams I thought were impossible, and met some really great people.  Yet I know i've still lots to learn and i'm most definitely looking forward to that.  Right, this is probably way too long already so I'm gonna wrap this up, but as always feel free to chat to me on twitter

Cinnamon xxx

PS no panties were permanently damaged, yay

An afternoon of filming fun

Hey everyone, I guess its that time for another post again.  Luckily just a day after another fun afternoon so I don't need to rumble around my imagination to try and come up with something to post.

The dress I wore for the day

Towards the end of last week I received a message from Mistress Courtney asking if I could help do some filming again for her which of course I said yes to.  I kind of had a feeling how the day would go after doing it a couple of times already until sunday afternoon when Mistress sent me another message both confirming the time, and telling me to bring a dress.  The part about a dress was definitely new.  Anyways I got up yesterday and did a few jobs I needed to do before getting myself ready and heading off to the dungeon with  dress and my wig in a bag.  I parked up and waited a couple of minutes before heading down and being greeted by Mistress.  I swear she looks stunning whatever she wears, and was excited about the afternoon.  We set up in the dungeon room as the other slave arrived and then Mistress asked me if I was forgetting something.  Gulp, so it was time for  me to get myself changed into my pink dress and wig, with a touch of lipstick too.  I didnt wear any heels as the camera is worth a bucketload and well I would hate to have tripped while using it.  When I was ready Mistress said "thats better"  I did feel a bit apprehensive as the other slave was there and inbetween clips  we were chatting etc, but that soon disappeared as we moved around the dungeon filming a load of different kinky fetish clips, including a couple that made my eyes water *blushes* But as always i'm not going to go into details here, you'll have to check Mistresses clips sites for that!

Maybe I can wear this one at an event soon

We took a break half way through the day and this was slightly scary as we all nipped outside for some fresh air, but I was still dressed in my dress but thankfully wasn't really in a visible position to anyone, there were some clip ideas for the future bouncing around then.  Then we went back in for some more clips.  There was one where both the slaves and Mistresses reaction to a certain toy being used was genuinely hilarious and I had to really bite my lips to stay silent, I soon burst into a giggle after we ended the clip though.  Finally after we finished the last clip for the day (or so I thought) I was instructed to kneel over a bench and was strapped down.  I was spanked and teased with Mistresses nails until I was shivering.  I didnt even care that the other slave was watching or that it was being recorded, It was actually fun, and has made me long for my next session,  I keep telling myself its less than a month now!

We tidied up and had a chat, and some delicious cookies that Mistress had brought with her, before saying our goodbyes, but I did manage to ask if I would be able to attend an event next month at the Chambers where Sinnation was held.  I missed the last one as I hit a massive wall after the fun of subversion the day before and travelling back up from that there London!  But I have had fun at the couple I attended, I can only dream that Mistress would be able to go as well *blushes*  And also hot off the press, the date for the second Bitches UnleaSHEd event at cirque has been released, hopefully i'll be able to attend this one as well, especially as i'm off work that week, the last one apart from the stairs of doom was a great night, that reminds me, maybe I need to find myself a pretty pair of flats??


Right i'm gonna wrap this up and have a coffee and relax, stay kinky ppl, and as always feel free to chat, either here or on twitter

Cinnamon xxx

An upcoming anniversary

Hi everyone, thought I would try to make a quick post, i'm sorry it probably wont be as fun as my last post but it feels like a bit of a milestone.

I've been writing posts on this blog for nearly 18 months now, and exploring my submissive side slightly longer.  I was happy, making the occasional niteflirt call to the MeanGirls when I could and doing assignments for them.  I'd had a couple of semi public experiences like say at the makeup counter, but it was about this time last year I got a small bonus from my job, and after a lot of thought an idea was forming in my head.  I'd thought about a Real Time session with a dominatrix in the past, but to be honest had been a little scared, or had not been in a position to treat myself financially, so nothing had come of my thoughts.



Anyways, I can remember being on my knees on cam to the MeanGirls one night, pretty much around this time last year, having had a good a call as ever,  and having just a quick chat after, I just asked if they would mind if I looked into having a RT session.   I was thankful they said sure and that it was cool.  Even though its like a year ago I can remember coming off the phone and thinking oh god I will have to look into this now.  I took a good few days before really doing anything although I had looked at a number of websites of Dommes.  I guess in my area up here in the NW we are blessed with a number of Mistresses.  (well within an hour or so's drive)  There were a few who's websites stood out, and one more than any others.  (for a reason i've kept private since then for fear of sounding stupid)

I read the website and read it again.  Before writing an email trying to follow what the website said.  I wrote it and left it in my drafts for a couple of days all nervous, while googling things like "How to initially contact a Mistress" trying to gather some tips.  It was probably about a week later I was comfortable and ready to send the email.  I tried to keep it short, polite, explaining my interests but also that i'd never done anything like this before so I really wasn't sure of my limits etc, and briefly mentioned pretty much the one thing that I really have no interest in exploring.

I can still remember sitting there for a moment after I pressed send, my heart was racing and I thought well its done now.  I wasn't expecting a reply straight away, but hoped that the email I had sent was ok and wouldn't just be dismissed. I also went away wild camping for a couple of days so had no access to any form of internet,  but a few days later when I was back I checked my emails and had a reply.

Ready for my first ever spanking

Yes the Mistress said she would be able to arrange a session around what I had put in my email, while also explaining not all sessions would involve pain, plus there would be a safe word etc.  I felt at ease with the reply and over another couple of emails had a date and time set for my first session.  It was still a couple of weeks ago so my imagination had a lot of fun.  Indeed I think the MeanGirls had fun teasing me about what may happen on a call before the session, while also saying I would have to let them know what happened in detail.  Then finally the day came, I followed the instructions I had been given, (confirming in the morning etc) and I headed off into the unknown.  I can still visualise that first session so clearly, from the Dungeon door opening and meeting Mistress Courtney for the first time.  Being shown into the dungeon and having an introductory chat, (where I did confess the reason I had been drawn to her website) before being left for a moment.  When Mistress re-entered the session started and I was almost under a spell.  From the instant Mistress realised I was in panties *blushes* that little giggle.  I had my first spanking, and my first real experience of real time BDSM play

Since then I've had some more sessions that I will have commented on already on here, and some experiences that I never would have thought possible just a short while ago.  If someone had told me I would have been on nights out dressed totally as Cinnamon I would have probably bet my car against it, but it happened,  helping out as a camera-man (ahem sissy) again I wouldn't have believed it, being used as a "demo" model in front of a hen party of 10 women?  you've guessed it, I may have dreamed it but never thought it possible.   And here I am looking forward to my next session, a year on from the first, with the possibility of something else Mistress has mentioned in the future too.  I've probably never been happier or felt more accepted for this side of me, and i'm sure i'll be back with more updates with more kink in them than this one.

I guess this post has a bit of a subverted meaning to it,  if you have dreams, there is no harm in chasing them.  It doesn't matter if "normal" people would think that they are a bit weird, if everyone was the same life would be so boring.  Take a chance and go for them.  I found out yesterday an old schoolfriend has passed away, its reminded me life is short.  Happiness in yourself is more important than any material riches, and keeping hopes and dreams bottled away is no quick route to the happy places.


I'm gonna wrap this up, hope this post doesn't bore anyone, I just felt I had to write it and as always feel free to chat to me on twitter

Cinnamon xxx

A night at BitchesUnleaSHEd

Hi everyone, its time for another of these blog posts, and I hope this will be quite an exciting one.

  A few months ago i'd heard through twitter that there was going to be a Femdom evening organised by two well known Mistresses in Manchester.  I had asked for some info back then, and then a few weeks ago while I was in London with Mistress Courtney at Subversion the event came up, and I was told that I could go with her.  Tickets were bought, plans were starting to be made and Mistress told me that she had rented a house with Mistress Evilyne and that I could meet their group there to travel to the venue Cirque.

A couple of weeks ago I was told that I would have be pretty much ready when I arrived at the house which set off paranoia in my head and got my nerves up.  I was going to have to leave my home pretty much ready, and last week while I was helping Mistress film she said that my makeup would have to be done ready as well, or at very least the basics.  To me that was a total first, I've never gone out of my house dressed before, (well apart from the lingerie underneath everything etc) I'm not going to lie but it had been on my mind literally all week, I knew I was wearing a new satin dress which i've found impossible to get a decent picture of, but when I tried it it felt electric on my body, and slowly throughout the week I made a plan.

Saturday came and I had to get the boring work rubbish out of the way first before heading home.  I made sure I ate this time, and then started to get myself ready with a shower, shave etc.  Then I started to get dressed, new tights, the dress, I did have a zip up hoodie on, and also a pair of jeans over everything,  if it was just that the journey would have been fine,  but then the makeup.  I started by moisturising then a primer, and my skin matched foundation which didnt look too bad, I then worked on my eyes and was quite happy with them.  Although they never look as good as when others have done them.  I then packed a bag up with the extras. (my bag, heels, wig, makeup etc) and sat waiting for instructions.

Following a message with the address to go to I headed off.  Nervously checking there was no-one outside as I got in my car and programmed the satnav.  Once I got out of my village I actually felt ok for a while as the motorway was quiet and it was going dark.  But the satnav took me into the heart of Manchester down the M602 with all the well lit advertising boards making me very paranoid, especially sat at traffic lights alongside other cars, I was trying to look away from everyone else *blushes*  Anyways I soon found the address and pulled up outside, took a moment to breathe and have a drink of water before getting out and knocking on the door.  When it was opened I thought at first I was in the wrong place as there were two other guys there who I didnt recognise, I asked if I was in the right place but I was thankfully and was told Mistress Courtney was through at the back.  so I took my shoes off and headed through. There were two ladies on a couch who commented on my makeup straight away, I could feel the nerves growing now as I walked through and was greeted by Mistress.  I was then introduced to everyone, including Madam Cruella, Miss Angelica Andrews and Mistress Evilyne, the other guys, and was told to sit and chat.  They were friendly and my nerves at walking into a room of strangers while wearing a dress and makeup soon disappeared.  Mistress went upstairs to get ready before calling me up so I could get ready.  It was at this point where Mistress gave me a collar to put on for the night.  I was feeling very lucky.  And hopefully I looked ok in my outfit.

Back downstairs we ordered taxi's before setting off. As in London a few weeks ago getting into the taxi was nerve-wracking but a few minutes later we were pulling up outside the club. As we got in it seemed very crowded but I instantly felt a little more at ease as there were plenty of people dressed, I even recognised a couple of faces.  We made our way to the bar area and at this point I remember being tickled and giggled at when it made me blush, before being asked if I was Cinnamon, I chatted to the slave while we were at the bar and the Mistresses were chatting It was then time to explore. There was three floors in the club, we then headed down some pretty evil stairs to the lower area that holds the dungeon, an outdoor smoking area and a cloakroom/changing area.  There was bits of play happening all over, and as usual i'm not going to give all the details away but safe to say it looked like all the Mistresses were enjoying themselves.  Throughout the night I met a number of Mistresses i've never met in person before, and when some of them recognised the name Cinnamon I tingled.  There was also a moment when a Mistress commented on my legs, which is something thats never happened before.  Being introduced as one of Mistresses "boys" made me feel so lucky all through the night.
  It was also good to have a brief chat to some people i've met before especially Princess Jessika who I met last year at Sexhibition and Miss Raven who recognised me from the couple of parties I went to at Sinnation,   I really had a good time, and apart from walking up and down the stairs dont think i've ever been as comfortable around others dressed as Cinnamon.  There was one moment that really stuck in my mind though, a Mistress asked me why I was not wearing any of the wristband bracelets, I wasn't sure what to say but Mistress Courtney lent in and said that I was collared, at that I felt my insides shaking.

All in all it was a great night, full of dancing, chatting, watching some play, drinking (well for everyone who wasn't driving) and being around people who just accepted everyone for who there are,  I really enjoyed it, and once we left the club we headed back to the house for a coffee and a chat.  I then asked permission to get changed and I went upstairs to get back into boy mode,  Mistress Courtney asked why i'd taken my makeup off when I came down, that set the blushing off again, I soon had to set off for home, and took the collar off that Mistress had lent me and she whispered we may have to get me a pink one *blushes* that thought has been in my dreams the last couple of nights.  I said my goodbyes and headed home, fighting off sleep and feeling like I was in that floaty space all over again, even though I was shattered I had to just sit a while and think when I got home.

Finally I have to say congratulations to the organisers of Bitches UnleaSHEd Miss Kitty, and Mistress Brown, the night seemed to go really well.  I hope they both enjoyed it as much as the people I spoke to during the night, I hope theres more events like it, and if allowed i'll definitely be going back.

Right this seems to have gone on way too long so i'm gonna wrap it up, but as always feel free to chat, either here or on twitter i'm always there, when I'm not lost in a fantasy of hmmm maybe i'll save that one for next time ;)

Cinnamon xx

Another fantastic experience and day

Hiya everyone.  I thought it was time to make another post after the exciting day I had yesterday.  I'd received a message from Mistress Courtney last week asking if I could help out being a cameraman erm sissy again.  It was on a day off work for me so of course I said I could.


I think it was last November I had a drive in the wettest conditions i've known down to a dungeon in the Midlands to help film and had no real idea what I was walking into. You can read about it here  This time the weather was nice, the drive was shorter and I had a rough idea of what would happen.  I'm guessing it also means I was ok managing the camera last time!  Since then however I've had a session with Mistress where she mentioned filming maybe with me, and she made a couple of private clips in that session, so there was a part of me slightly apprehensive, especially being told to make sure I was wearing panties.

Anyways I pulled up at the dungeon for the day, and was greeted warmly as ever by Mistress Courtney before the other victims, or should that be winners arrived.  I was in my element setting up the camera stuff as I am a total techy geek sometimes, and the new camera, wow!  Before long we were ready to go, and the filming started.  I'm not going to go into detail of what happened, I'm sure the clips will be on Mistresses clips sites soon.  But there were plenty of erm activities catered for, from caning to electrics to ball kicking with lots more as well.  I guess i'm probably going to talk about my feelings a little more.  I definitely felt more relaxed than last time and had a bit more of an idea how the day would go and what I would see.  I felt a bit more confident joining in the between scenes banter, and accidentally made one of the slaves jump.  Mistress was checking some electrics as he was tied down, saying maybe the batteries are going, I offered to wire it to the mains, hehehe that was a jump and a half and everyone laughed.  Towards the end of the day Mistress said next time maybe I would have to be in some of the clips, and even if I wasn't I would have to be in a dress to film that she may decide on.  I think my reaction showed that the idea excites me.  It was definitely picked up on by Mistress, I was finding as well just like last time I was getting the cravings to be played with myself, however much I was enjoying being behind the camera.

 After we finished filming we all helped to pack up and tidy, before walking Mistress to her car with her equipment.  The other slaves then left and Mistress talked me through the start of the plan for saturday night.  I'm feeling very lucky to be attending this FemDom event Bitches UnleShed, especially to be going in a group with Mistress.  I'm sure it will be another great experience for me, and everyone who is going, I believe its a sellout now.  Best thing was I got home last night and my new dress for the night has arrived and it fits pretty well.  Now all I have to do is worry about driving down to Manchester to meet Mistress in it,  (gulp gulp and treble gulp) but I have my instructions and won't disobey.  I'm not going to post any pics of it yet as I want it to be a surprise.

And as a strange twist of fate, I've been discussing arranging my next session with Mistress too, kind of throwing some dates around when I'm off work etc, Mistress came back with a date that would work, and by a twist of fate its on the one year anniversary of my first ever session with her.  I was like wow, when I realised, and Mistress really enjoyed it when I pointed it out too.  Its a year thats definitely flown by, so much has changed and i'm not looking back.  Hope you enjoy the read and as always feel free to chat to me on here or twitter

Cinnamon xxx

New outfits, events and an excited me!

Hey, its that time again to dust off my keyboard and make another blog post with a bit of an update.  I guess i'd best get the worst part out of the way first, after last weekends fun at Subversion I had a couple of pretty lousy days.  I think after speaking to some others once again it may have been a bit of subdrop.  I thought it strange as it wasn't like I was in a session or anything like it was last time.  However I guess the experience of the weekends was pretty intense.  I have to say as well, thankyou to the people on twitter who chatted and helped me through it.

I really did have the best antidote for it last week on Monday night too, I spent it as always listening to the kinky radio show on secret102.com and they had a special guest, the one and only Mistress Courtney who appeared to be a natural, and she won their Mistress Chart too, so I was doubly happy!

Moving on from the subversion weekend, in the last few days I've bought myself a ticket to another event called Bitches Unleashed,  its just a couple hundred miles closer to home, organised by a couple of well known Mistresses at a club in Manchester, where it appears there will be a lot of Mistresses attending, including Mistress Courtney, and others that I have met at Sinnation, whereas Subversion was a fetish club, this is a night devoted to femdom, I am nervously excited for it, although i've once again got the wardrobe dilemma, hmm what to wear.  With an added fear factor that I may have to get ready at home and drive there however I am dressing for the night.  I may look into another option for it lol.  I'm sure there will be a post on this night afterwards, I'm also looking forward to meeting some other people that I have chatted to for a while on twitter.  I'm sure it will be a fantastic night and hopefully all the Mistresses there have a lot of fun at the expense of the submissives attending.

Last week as well I was online and found a "fancy dress" outfit in a sale on a website, I could not resist and had to get it, its very short with a tutu bottom, but it fits like a dream.  The pic i've posted doesn't do the sparkles justice, there were "wings" and a "halo" with the outfit but they feel pretty flimsy to be honest, I kinda just like the dress part.  I'm not sure of the dress code for my next event, but maybe i'll have the confidence to wear this to an event one day.  The reaction it got on twitter was unexpectedly awesome.  I think for a tenner it was a bargain.  Coupled with a wavy wig, makeup and a couple of filters I love the results!!!  If I could look like this all the time I would be sooooooooo happy,


I'm sure the fantasies and cravings i'm having will keep getting stronger, and hopefully will have managed to book another session again too.  As well as maybe something else Mistress has suggested, I was reflecting the other day and genuinely appreciate just how lucky I am.  Anyways i'm gonna wrap this post up and as always feel free to chat, either here or on twitter

Cinnamon xxx

A trip, a club, and another new experience.

Hey everyone, I guess regular readers may have known this post was coming.  After a lot of anticipation, nerves and excitement my time off work had come.  Some of you will have seen on twitter I seem to listen to secret102 quite a lot and they had arranged to have a meet at Club Subversion.  I was also lucky that Mistress Courtney had said that I could go with her to the event, which had kind of put a few of my nerves at rest.  But also made my excitement grow even more.

Anyways, the day came, I had my instructions of where to meet Mistress and another of her slaves, (i'm not sure really if he would like naming so i'm refraining from it just in case) and thanks to the aftermath of storm Doris I boarded a train to London that was absolutely heaving, talk about sardines in a tin.  I found a little bit of the floor and claimed it before settling in for a fairly uncomfortable journey. But I couldnt care less about it as my mind was totally elsewhere, and after a couple of hours the train pulled in at Euston station.  I'd had a message telling me where to meet Mistress and set off in search, it didnt take too long before I spotted her and fairly nervously headed over.  I was introduced to her other slave and greeted,  I could actually feel my nerves lifting as I was told a couple of plans.

We headed outside and from there I was just a passenger as various ways of booking posh taxi's via apps were discussed and chosen from.  With the cases etc we thought this would be much easier than the tube then another train etc.  I must be honest once it was ordered it was pretty much there straight away, we loaded everything in and then set off.  We all chatted all the way to the hotel, and I realised just how much of a newbie at all this I am, but didnt feel out of place which was cool, it was quite a traffic filled journey but we got to the hotel in one piece and checked in.  We then went looking shopping round all the stores in the town centre as Mistress wanted to try and find some new shoes.  I was in heaven at this, especially walking into some of the department stores through the makeup areas and smelling all the cosmetics, being with Mistress also didnt bring us any of the stares I get when shopping alone and my head was racing with ideas *blushes*   Mistress found a bag she liked, and then we had a coffee,  pretty soon after that we headed back up to the hotel and met some of the others before taking a couple of hours to relax.  I ordered room service but the nerves were back by then and I hardly managed any.  I think being alone in the room was adding to them.  But after a while I received a message telling me to dress and come to Mistresses room.

I put my outfit on and felt extremely conscious walking through the hotel corridor to Mistresses with my sparkly pink dress on, I dont think anyone saw me though.  I knocked at the door and was let in.  I gave Mistress the small gift I'd brought for her as a thankyou for taking me and then was shown into the bathroom and sat down.  Mistress proceeded to do my makeup, taking her time and inside I was melting, I dont think i've ever worn so much in my life, I was in a special place once again, and for a long while was forbidden to take a look, when I was allowed I was in awe.  I wish could come up with results even half as good as that.

 We were still in Mistresses room when some other people started to come up ready for a pre-drink It was really good to meet some of the people I've been chatting to online and interacting with via the radio show for months, I still was feeling very much a newbie to the whole thing though and got quite shy, happy to be sat in the corner listening and taking it all in.  We then got ready for the taxis to the venue, which was a little chaotic, and I have to say walking through the hotel dressed fully as cinnamon was one of the most daunting experiences i've had, especially the reception area, but pretty soon I was safely on my way.  We got there and I had my next nightmare, but got through it ok, full on outside Stairs up to the club entrance, I was so glad I didnt fall!!!!

Following a quick security search and ticket check we were in, a huge room full of people into all sorts of kinky things, with fantastic costumes, I could feel my nerves subsiding, especially seeing others crossdressed, again more introductions and meeting people and to be honest being there with Mistress made me feel so lucky, I could really see how popular she is, with people wanting to chat with her.  The next few hours went in pretty much a blur i'll be honest.  Watching some play, hearing the scariest whip sound i've ever heard and laughing, chatting, and just feeling like the real me.  Some of the people I spoke to were so nice, and my dress was commented on, it was a great night.  To comment on the club, it was quite a large room, with a dancefloor that had been converted into a play area with crosses, benches, a cage and allsorts of scary and fun looking things, the bar was a good size and there was plenty of seating.  There was another room set up as a dance room, and a secluded outdoor smoking area, I was gutted that the toilets were down a set of stairs though, but I managed them without breaking my neck yay!

I met and spoke to so many people I dont know if I dare try and name them all on here as I may forget a couple, It was truly cool to meet so many others, especially Annabel Grey as her dress was amazing, Adam Green from the radio show, his partner, Mr Black Sheep and his wife who's home made feather hat was insanely cool.  Becky, Lady Sara Borgia, Domstrapon, Candie kitten and many more.  I'm really sorry if I have forgot anyone.  I had some other people come up and ask if I was Cinnamon as well which was really unexpected.  And although I didnt speak to them I did recognise a few people from  my day at Sexhibition last year.

When the time came to leave, I was in a taxi with Mistress Courtney and her other slave who I met much earlier, we went back to Mistresses room for a bit of a chat.  Again I felt lucky and hearing Mistresses ideas etc was an honour.  It got late before the walk back to my room still totally Cinnamon-ised but I wasn't even bothered if anyone saw me by then.  I got in and cleaned off my makeup ready for bed, wishing that wasn't a beauty essential as it was so nice.  Before a couple hours sleep, (i didnt get very much at all) In fact I was stood outside very early the next morning and Domstrapon came out, and at first didn't recognise me in normal boy clothes.  That really made me feel so awesome, its not the first time its happened either as it happened at Sinnation last month too!

Later in the morning I was summoned to meet Mistress Courtney and we had a drink in the bar with her other slave, Mr BlackSheep and Alexandria Web, before arranging for a ride back to Euston again in one of these app called taxis.  Trains were arranged when we got there and we saw Mistress off safely,  before getting ready for ours.  Mine was a complete change to the day before, indeed after the first stop I was left in an entire carriage by myself and was once again overdosing on coffee and having wild ideas about going out last night, maybe to the Sinnation party.  I was actually really tempted by this but when I finally got home and had a bite to eat I hit a wall, I think I was totally shattered, exhausted and knew I wasn't in a good enough place to make the drive there.  Even when I received a surprise phonecall from Mistress Felix,  next time i'll be back for sure!  Hopefully as well there are some other plans with Mistress Courtney too.  I'm so lucky and can't wait.  But as i say last night I virtually hit a wall and think I had about 15 hours sleep.  Full of deliciously kinky dreams.


Anyways this has gone on for ages now, sorry if i've rambled but as always feel free to chat either here or on twitter and if you want to see what all the radio fun is about check out secret102.com where the main show is broadcast mon-thurs from 9-11 pm!!

Cinnamon xxx

From a previous session but can't wait to be in that position again

An update and exciting times.

Hi everyone, its been a couple weeks since my last blog post so thought I would make a quick one.  Some very exciting things coming up, and its been a fun couple of weeks as well so here goes.

Theres been so many views of my last couple of posts, about the session with Mistress Courtney and the video clip she recorded during the session, its given me a feeling i've never really had before.  Especially with a couple of the comments i've had about it, I dont really know how to explain it, other than its a good feeling, with it being a video I felt much more exposed than in say an edited picture.  Maybe theres a part of me that likes being an exhibitionist I never knew about.  I'd like to thank anyone who offered any encouragement about it, or let me know what they thought of the video, its really appreciated.

Right on with the post.  A couple of weeks ago I finally got the chance to call the Mean Girls again on niteflirt.  I've had money in my account there since last summer but with a glitch on international calls, when I had tried the platform would not connect us.  I'd almost given up on it, but tried when I saw them online earlyish and it worked.  I guess the call was slightly different to when I used to call all the time as I was chatting about things that have happened.  Especially things like helping Mistress Courtney at the Hen party last year.  They were telling me how they would have loved to have seen the look on my face as I got all embarrassed.  Even after all this time I found that they remembered little things about me, especially like the way I quite often squirm and wiggle about when I get excited yet a little uncomfy,  It was really good to catch up with them.  Hope to do it again, although I have no idea when I will be able to.

If you've been under a rock you may not have known it was the superbowl on Sunday just gone.  I found myself being asked before the game started if I fancied playing a little sissy game through it all.  I was intrigued as I have done something similar in the past.  Anyways Mistress Elesa (who has been an amazing and supporting lady as i've come on this journey) set me the task of cheering along for every point scored, just like a cheerleader, and also whenever a team got into the end zone.  For every flag I had to spank myself, and for every turnover use the magic wand for a short period of time.  This was tricky enough however there was also the half time show.  I was told I had to copy Lady Gaga's every move.  (thankfully not the jumping off the side of the stadium.)  It was like a full on workout, and I still had the second half of the game to go.
  I was getting quite worked up and feeling very girly, then I received a message while the Falcons were still up by over 20 points.  If the Falcons win, I could orgasm on thursday, but if the Patriots won I could on Monday.  So as the comeback started I got more and more excited.  I couldn't believe the final score, but lets just say I enjoyed Monday night.

Finally for this post i've just about got all my tickets sorted for something that promises to be really exciting, and I guess I'll make a post about it afterwards, but i'm going to one of Londons fetish club nights, and really looking forward to it.  Outfit, tickets, travel etc are now all sorted.  I have a few nerves but know that I will be fine.  I do feel very lucky about it.  Especially that I wont be going alone to it.  If you see me getting over excited on twitter in the next couple of weeks I apologise in advance.  Feel free to chat to me on there though.  And I guess i'll be back soon.

Cinnamon xxx

A little extra from my session

Hi, this is something i've never done before, but as I posted in my last entry there was a totally new element (for me) in the session.  Mistress actually recorded some clips whilst making me squirm.

I was asked to think over how i'd feel about other people seeing these, and to be honest the thought actually has me excited quite a bit, so as a one off and with permission from Mistress Courtney I thought I would share one of the clips.

I know i'm not exactly svelte, so please dont feel the need to point that out, but the thought of others seeing it is quite exciting, just pls watch it alone, its probably well definitely not safe for work.

And of course, a huge thanks to Mistress Courtney for the amazing session and ideas.

So feel free to chat either here or on my twitter

Cinnamon xxx